Say No to the “S” Word
10 years ago I banned this “S” word from my vocabulary. Guess what it is?
Sh*t?
Good guess! But no. I actually use it more, in an affirmation, “when life gives you sh*it, make fertilizer.” (Plans are in the works to turn this quote into mugs, journals, motivational swag)
The banned word is someday. On the surface, “someday” sounds like an accommodating word. Flexible, simple, deceptively innocent. In reality, this word has the stealth potency of a mosquito to slow suck the lifeblood from your dreams. Someday was code for, “Good on you for having a brilliant idea! Let's save it for later when you're ready, okay?”
Which most of my life, meant never. I fell for it for 20 years. Looking back, I see clearly my life has been lived out in two ways: "Someday" moments when I didn't take the leap. They degenerated into my biggest regrets (aka my “graveyard of unfulfilled dreams”).
But there were also the moments I followed the inner nudge and leaped before I was ready:
I leaped and created a blog that reached 100k readers a month before the age of Twitter – without ads or media credentials.
I leaped and designed custom wedding invitations for clients after designing my own. My business caught interest from a Martha Stewart Living producer even though I had no formal design experience and didn't yet have a company name.
I leaped and told a boyfriend I was in love with him right after he broke up with me. We just celebrated our 11-year wedding anniversary.
My decision to say no to “someday” has trained me little by little to step out of my comfort zone and leap when I hear a holy nudge. It’s a required mindset entrepreneurs, thought leaders, and difference makers have had to master. Because fear will trick us into procrastinating and believing we really will achieve it someday.
So how do we conquer the compulsion to someday our dreams to death?
Step 1: Banish “someday” from your vocabulary.
If you catch yourself saying or thinking “someday” to yourself, write down your idea and assign it a date in your calendar.
Example: Someday, I’ll write my book → On January 15, 2021, I’ll write the sh*tty draft of my book.
Step 2: Tell someone your intention and ask them to check up on you that day to see if you’re taking at least a baby step forward. PRO TIP: The more people you tell
Example: Hey Marina, I’m planning on writing the sh*tty draft of my book on January 15, 2021. Will you text me on that day and ask me if I’ve started?
Step 3: Uncover your personal “why” for this project and write it down.
Example: I’m writing this book to help people like me who’ve struggled with shyness to own their voice, and speak with power and confidence.
Writing this down and seeing it daily boosts your chances for achieving your dream, according to neuroscience.
Step 4: Invest in the help needed to achieve your audacious idea.
The bolder the idea, the more help you’re going to need. Do you need support to free up capacity to focus on your dream idea? Or do you need a mentor or coach to level up your skills or mindset? Write down the barriers in your way (external and internal), and brainstorm what type of support is needed to overcome each barrier. Accountability, strategic advice, technical implementation, creative support or feedback.
If your dream involves igniting a movement behind your business or personal brand, here’s where I’m here to help. I teach and help entrepreneurs, coaches and difference makers like you to articulate your unique message and brand story that stands out naturally.
Own Your Message is a 12-week small group incubator that guides you step-by-step through my signature process for unlocking an irresistible personal brand story that creates a lane that's all your own.
One student uncovered her zone of genius and is turning it into a book.
One student developed her signature ideas for a TED talk.
One student crystallized her “why” and it helped her market and sell her offers with more clarity and confidence.
One student doubled her annual income and has started working with dream clients doing what she loves.
When was the last time you did something before you felt ready? It’s never too late to take a leap – and it’s worth it when you do. If you’re hearing a nudge to define your unique lane of expertise and play on a bigger stage, book a discovery call now to explore ways we can work together.
No matter what, promise me you won't say "someday" to yourself ever again.
